CID’S JOURNAL
Okay, they not only come up with a lame-ass idea, but they follow it up with things just as lame-assed. They’re having some sort of stupidity contest again, I swear!
First thing they direct Vincent to is the fish. The fish! The lame-ass fish that just sit there. Or swim there. And that’s all they do!
Not that anyone bothered to think about a critter that needs to live in a tank of water in a damn airplane. What? Do they think I can make it a tiny aquatic seatbelt?
This disaster ended before it started. He just stood there, staring at the damn buggers, until Yuffie asked him what he though. By then a whole goddamn hour had gone by.
"These are the most depressing things I’ve ever seen," Vincent said. No, really, he said that. I mean, I kinda got the idea this whole mess was somehow supposed to result in him being less depressed.
Well, I was right. Unfortunately, I was also close. It took all three of us—me and the two idiots who came up with this—to drag his depressed butt somewhere else. While dragging said butt, Yuffie saw something she said was cute and I said was easier to get some damn scotch tape.
There these little lizards called geckos and they make a hobby out of sticking to any surface they could find, including me, the ceiling, the windows, the toilet and other stupid places for a lizard. I don’t know why it wanted to be there in the first damn place. I don’t know why Yuffie thought it was a good idea to get Vincent one, either.
First the damn thing was stuck to his arm all day. First he tired arguing with it, and then he went around ignoring it, pretending there wasn’t a damn lizard glued to him. Then it tried to get on Red, and he chased it around and then the fucker was lost. Stupid dog. Should’ve eaten it.
Stupid thing spends more time on the ceiling than Vincent.
Eventually it freaked my out by deciding it wanted to live on my windshield. It’s so fucking freaky to have a damn lizard right the rein the sky lookin’ at you.
Eventually Yuffie threw a broom at it and knocked it down. Thankfully there’s an animal shelter near Gold Saucer. We tried leaving it there, but it wouldn’t get off the broom.
Now they have a new broom.
Too bad the girls think this is still a good idea. What, does something have to blow up to teach these people what not to do? I doubt even that’d work since they used to be setting’ bombs.