Most people think people go two different ways in life. They’re too dumb to understand so go about smiling through life because they don’t get it, or they’re brooding and cynical because they think they know life is someone playing a mean joke on you.
This guy broke the rules. He was the kind of person you admire even at a distance because it’s obvious he knows about every aspect in life and still wanders around with a grin. He’s the type of person that can wake you up in the morning to sell you encyclopedias and you’ll actually listen to him read it before buying it. He’s the kind of nice person you hand money too even though he’s obviously not homeless or in trouble. He’s the person who if his house burned down he’d immediately grab marshmallows and invite the neighborhood to a barbecue. He’s the type of person who you’d trust your kids with even without asking. He’s one of those people with whom even his clothes get along perfectly.
He was the happiest person at the wedding. He could have helped Vincent through the ordeal. But there was one things with no part of his cheerful demeanor couldn’t smooth over.
"The high priest of WHAT?" Vincent yelled.
"The high priest of The Cult of Sephiroth." His mother said. "Now, he’s a bit ‘New Age’ but he cost a lot of money and the cult is very prestigious. Besides, you’re Aunt converted just last week and agreed to hire him for us. Now don’t do anything that could embarrass anyone. We’ve been thrown out of six churches over the years, I’m not having you disgrace us by getting kicked out of this one!" Vincent’s mother scolded him. "And close your mouth, you look like an idiot gawking like that."
"But—" Vincent said.
"Oh, I assure you Mr. Valentine, we’re nothing you’re probably thinking we are," the priest said.
"But—"
"Everyone says we’re nothing but New Age teens trying to get back at their parents. All black and candles and completely disorganized. Why don’t I tell you about us?"
"Vincent you’re messing up your hair pulling on it like that!" his mother scolded, trying to fix his hair, only to get whatever thick toxic substance it had been coated with on her hands.
"But…" Vincent muttered before collapsing on the ground unconscious.
"Oh my," the priest said. "That’s never happened before."