"You asked to see me, sir?" the captain asked.
"I am starting to miss the Farplane," Kinoc said. "Would you mind explaining why we are doing a worse job at covert operations and hostile takeovers than the Besaid Aurochs are at Blitzball?"
"Sir, we are doing the best we can. Considering the situation—"
"Situation nothing! First you shoot a hostage we need to use to keep from going to war—and they turn out to be a dead blitzballer for the worst team in history and a dead baby! Then you deliver the message that Yuna’s friends are being kept here AFTER Yuna has left Guadosalam."
"Sir, we had to give the prisoner proper medical attention first so as not to be seen as an act of war with Besaid."
"Well it sure as hell looks like it now!" Kinoc yelled. "I did not come back from the dead to have my plans ruined by improper training with machina and a high-strung flunky!"
"You did, however, return from the fear of your predecessors, which you made good time getting rid of."
"Your point?"
"I mean that you’ll no doubt think of something."
"About that…" Kinoc said. "Double the guards. I am not as weak as Seymour, but it is human to remember one’s enemies."
"May I ask who?"
"No, you may not. The less I think about it the less likely it is that he’d show up."
"Anything else, sir?"
"Yes, shut that baby up! Dead or not, I can’t sleep with that racket."
……………………………………………………………………….
Kinoc had lied. Once worried about something he kept worrying about it until he had the opportunity to shoot it or it went away. Or it killed him first.
Seymour had the advantage of being at the center of attention of the political world, and one of the few people who knew how to send on top of that. The only hours he could possibly spend afraid were when he was asleep—or was supposed to be and was too worried about nightmares to have them.
Kinoc knew he had been worrying for too long and that he wouldn’t manage to get him out of his mind until the man was killed again.
………………………………………………………………………
Returning to life from the Farplane is a confusing enough. Coming back wondering if you were hungover or drunk is worse. Guards with spears aimed at your head … it was not going to be a good day for Auron.
"What the…?" he asked.
"All humans entering Guadosalam, from the Farplane or otherwise, are to be executed," a guard said.
"Until this war is over, no mercy shall be shown," another said.
"Come with us, or we resort to violence."
"Wait," Auron said, thinking he was hungover without having had anything to drink. "Die now or later? Those are my choices?"
"Um …"
"Actually, he has a point."
"Look, who cares either way?"
Auron put his face in his good hand and shook his head.
"Try dealing with this sort of stuff all day," someone said behind the guards.
The guards turned their heads and Auron looked up, then wondered what exactly he had been drinking.
"Seymour!"
"You’re not supposed to be here!"
"Exactly the point," Seymour said, taking the knife from his sleeve and pointing it at his own neck. "Now who’s going to get into trouble if something happens?"
"But—" one of the guards said, pointing to Auron.
"And you didn’t stop it," Seymour said smugly.
The guards looked confused. Auron looked like he wondered if it was worth it to kill himself and go back the Farplane.
"Umm …"
"What do we do about him?"
"Pretend you never saw him. Or pretend you just saw him and then kill him. Or I kill myself and all of you die."
Hesitantly, the confused guards lowered their spears and left.
"Well, that was the most pathetic thing I’ve ever done," Seymour said, putting the knife away once the guards had left.
"What happened to your arm?" Auron asked, noticing Seymour was using his left hand.
"It’s broken."
"What do you want?"
"Peace and quiet, but I’d settle for you letting me be concise."
"What’s going on?" Auron asked.
"Even if I were concise about that one, it’d take too long to tell you. You’re going to get yourself killed, I’m going to get in trouble if I’m caught out here."
"So what do you want me to do?"
"You were a bodyguard before. Just do whatever you did last time, without being seen, though."
"What are you planning?"
"To be concise: surviving."
"Surviving what?"
"Everything," Seymour said. "Look, I’m running out of time. I didn’t even know anyone was coming back, let alone you. I was trying to find another way to get someone out of here. Now or never; I can tell the guards you attacked me or I can tell them they never saw you."
Auron said nothing, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
"I’m already taking a risk being here, let alone asking you."
"Where’s Yuna?"
"Off following something shiny and blonde for all I know," Seymour said angrily. "This was a waste of escaping." He turned around and started down the stairs.
"Fine," Auron said. Live first, then ask questions. Preferably while still living.
"She may need to borrow you jacket," Seymour said, obviously waiting for Auron to follow.
"We saw nothing," one of the guards said as they passed them.
"We didn’t?" another asked, earning a punch in the ribs with an elbow. "Oh, I get it now."
…………………………………………………………………………………
Anzi had been sneaking Juuno into the city for Lord Jyscal, and years after that sneaking Seymour out so he could get away from his father. She knew many ways in and out.
She, however, couldn’t defend herself against her own dress if it attacked her.
Auron was appreciative for the fact that she was so scared she admitted every detail of what Seymour was trying to do and what in the world was happening, but he’d hoped he could ditch her. He promised to get someone out. Technically he didn’t have to watch her any more.
Unfortunately, she was so terrified, she clung to him and refused to leave—as well as the only thing up Seymour’s sleeve was a knife Anzi gave him to defend himself against his father.
At least she was mature enough not to cry.
There was a sudden noise behind them and she closed the gap between them and grabbed the skirt of his coat.
"Damn," Auron said.
"What was that?" Anzi asked. "We’re near Bevelle, they wouldn’t—"
Snipers stood from the bushes, silencing her.
Auron went for his sword.
"Sorry," one of them said.
"…?" Was all Auron could manage. Anzi still clung to him.
"We were looking for Yuna. Personally, I think we’re too late."
"You were going to shoot Yuna?" Auron asked. Anzi had said Bevelle wanted to stay as neutral as possible and Djose was trying to get their hands on Guadosalam without any actual use of force. Kilika and Luca were too busy killing each other and trying not to kill each other to bother with anyone else.
"What? Of course not," the sniper said, tossing his gun down. "This is in case we find spies from Djose."
"You’re trying to start a war with Djose?" Auron asked.
"I thought you were neutral," Anzi said from behind Auron.
"Actually, we’re trying to prevent a war with Djose. And them going to war with the Guado. And Besaid from getting involved."
"Huh?" Auron said.
"It’s complicated. Hey, you’re Sir Auron, right?"
"Not sure about the title, but yes, that’s my name."
"I think all over our problems are solved, then. Come with us."
"Why?"
"Well, you guys are perfect. If you insist we can wait until another of Yuna’s friends and a Guado show up."
"It’s been a slow day," one of the lackeys said.
"Barely managed to shoot lunch."
"I still say—" the first lackey butted in.
"Sinspawn are not edible!" another yelled at him. No, this was not turning out to be a good day.
"We’re not allowed to talk about it beyond this. You’ll have to come with us for answers.
Auron was almost about to vote on stomping through the jungle and struggling to find a boat to Besaid in the midst of several war-torn nations and pretending this never happened. Almost.
"I need a drink," he said.