"Paine? Paine!" the voice from the flying recorder yelled.
Paine didn’t move. She just lay there on the floor.
"You think she’s okay?
"She might just be unconscious…"
"HEY! WAKE UP! You can sleep on the way there!"
Paine didn’t wake up.
"Look at al that blood on her head, you think it’s hers?"
"Maybe we should go down there."
"I… am… going… to… kill… you…" Paine muttered without opening her eyes.
"She’s fine."
……………
"Where’s—" Whatever Tidus was about to say, was lost to immediate distraction… and immense pain as Seymour's fist met with his face.
"Oww," Tidus complained.
"There, I feel much better now," Seymour muttered, shaking out his wrist and turning away.
"What about me?" Tidus asked, rubbing his nose, having no real idea how to stop the bleeding.
"Here’s some advice," Seymour said, stopping walking away. "I’m married. You’re not."
"So why’d you hit me?" Tidus asked, wondering what surface he could wipe the blood off his hand.
"It was either hit you now, or I’d kill you later," Seymour said, this time continuing to walk away and not bothering to stop.
"Hey, wait up!" Tidus said. "So, what’d I do exactly?"
"You’re annoying, obnoxious, uncouth, unpleasant, a complete idiot and irritating. Not to mention, it is customary to keep one’s hands off a woman who is already married to another man."
"That’s no reason to hit me," Tidus said.
"If I wanted I could try to have you executed. You did, kill me, as I remember."
"…Right. That…" Tidus followed Seymour into a room, where Yuna was, although admittedly Seymour had been searching randomly for her.
"What the—" they heard as Yuna got up and stomped over to them. They both turned around to see Yuna. Only Seymour looked impressed.
"Do you have a tissue?" Tidus asked.
"Have you two been fighting?" She asked.
"No," Tidus said. "He just punched me."
"Seymour!" she yelled. "Why—"
She was cut off as he raised his left ring finger at her.
"So… does anyone have a tissue?" Tidus asked.
No one answered. Yuna and Seymour glared at each other.
"Well?" Seymour asked suddenly, spreading his arms. His question was so sudden it seemed deafeningly loud.
"Well, what?" Yuna asked.
"Well, where’s your brilliant plan to kill this thing?" Seymour asked. "You’re not going to sing at it, are you?"
"I kinda didn’t give it much thought," Yuna said. "I mean, I nearly died back there!"
"Yes, well, so did I, but you don’t see me putting off trying to save the world," Seymour said.
"Then you think of something," Tidus said.
"What? When the last time I thought of something you people put a death-sentence on stupid ideas?"
"Not all stupid ideas…" Tidus said. If there was one thing he was worse at than thinking, it was shutting up.
"Just mine," Seymour said. He began to think. His major flaw in his last plan was letting on that he actually had a plan in the first place. Considering how unpopular he was, people would be opposed to his idea of what to eat for lunch. He’d tried to play the role of the righteous defender. He’d never noticed how often those types are killed off by complete jerks. He’d be a martyr this time. No one could argue with a martyr, no matter how little sense their plan made. This time he’d just have to do it right. He’d never realized how hard it was getting killed in the name of one’s ideals. Just plain dying seemed so easy.
It was obvious to Tidus that the gears in Seymour’s head were turning at blinding speed. Just because he couldn’t manage to wake up the hamster in his own head didn’t mean he couldn’t’ tell when other people were doing it better. Tidus could at least understand what the bigger danger was. This didn’t’ mean that Seymour and Yuna were any less married.
"Maybe it won’t come to Guadosalam," Yuna said.
"It doesn’t swim anymore Yuna, of course it’s coming here," Seymour said. "And I thought he was stupid."
"Hey!" Tidus protested.
"Why?" Yuna asked.
"Because there are no more faith now. If anyone’s going to stay dead, it’s going to come here for the farplane. And there are people in the way."
"Well at least it can’t fly," Tidus said.
Seymour looked at him, then at Yuna, then at both of them. "Is there a bigger word for ‘doomed?’"
………………
"So Bevelle’s a kiddie pool now, " Paine said.
"Pretty much," Rikku said. "LeBlanc came in handy though. She got everyone out of the place pretty fast."
If the world weren’t in so much danger, Brother would have complained that LeBLanc was sealing their jobs again.
"Where, though?" Paine asked.
"Didn’t ask," Rikku said. "Didn’t wanna push it."
"Push what?" Buddy asked.
"This got anything to do with why dumb and dumber are hanging out on a rooftop?" Paine asked.
"…Maybe," Rikku said. "It’s not that bad. They just don’t wanna face LeBlanc."
"This has to do with Nooj, doesn’t it?" Paine asked.
"Right… You knew him too… um… well…"
"This isn’t good news no matter what way I hear it," Paine said. "Spit it out."
"I’m not sure…" Rikku said. "There’s this sphere, but it’s no like anyone explains much in it."
"We’ve had spheres that were hard to make sense of before."
"Yeah, but didn’t those lead to someone trying to destroy the world?" Buddy asked.
"Another one?" Buddy asked. "We already got two."